i genuinely believe that 2012 was the optimal tumblr experience. like if you didnt live through 2012, you havent fully understood how much of a hell site this is. to jog some ppl’s memories:
francieum
quirkybrittany
justgirlythings
“I like your shoelaces” “I stole them from the president” and people actually fucking doing this in public
we still called porn fics “smut” and “lemons”
“you must be fun at parties”
cole sprouse’s tumblr social experiment, and some people taking it so seriously that they threatened mass suicide
mitt romney
hetastuck (hetalia and homestuck fandoms were moirails i guess)
hussieruya (people unironically shipping the creators of hetalia and homestuck)
andrew hussie actually asking about hussieruya in his twitter
the obsession with andrew hussie’s lips
superwholock fandom (this was their prime)
supernatural has a gif for everything
“Fuck you watson” somehow being praised as the best comeback possible?? ok lol
hipster side of tumblr vs fandom side of tumblr, and all those pictures of the two coexisting to bring some sort of peace? as if we were at war with each other?? wtf was up with that
the dumbest fake stories holy shit, and everyone believed them
benedict cumberbatch everywhere
that sherlock gif of benedict cumberbatch looking into a door’s peep hole and people saying how if you cover one side of his face he looks confident but if you cover the other side he looks sad, so they said he’s the best actor in the world or whatever
gangnam style everywhere
people being shamed from using memes or even saying the word meme
“Oh, you facebook people think tumblr is boring? Well, we’ll find you…Supernatural fandom, grab your demons! Sherlock fandom, grab your Watsons! Doctor Who fandom, grab your Tardises! Harry Potter fandom, grab your wands! Homestuck fandom, grab your strife cards! Hetalia fandom, grab your pasta!” proceed for 1628519 more fandoms
“im pretty sure thats taylor swift” “no thats becky”
the dancing chandler gif from friends
“Reblog if you dont have a problem with gay marriage!” followed by ten mile long additions of rainbow gifs and pictures and 9gag memes
potato jesus (i’ll admit, this was actually funny)
the reblog button being at the top of posts
cuil theory, aka “i give you a hamburger”
27 comments on a post just saying “INSTANT REBLOG” or “PRESS PLAY”
song mixups from people “accidentally opening a bunch of tabs playing music” but it was actually from a pop mix album
“ah, the scalene triangle”
XD vs 😀 discourse
the most reblogged picture on tumblr
doge
men of tumblr
the cursed long ass “fedoras arent that bad!” post
touch my butt and buy me pizza
spread this like wildfire
tumblr university (complete with uniforms)
tumblr island
tumblr nation
these all would lead to the creation and failure of dashcon
here’s what I, a person who has not listen to taz but does have a busy dashboard, think that taz is about:
a gay wizard named taco, the party tank who has a vehicle proficiency probably, and merle (and im gonna be honest I have fuckall idea what merle’s class is. carries a weird dollar store bible??? fucks plants???) are An Adventurers. they immediately blow up a town and maybe are hired by lucretia, who seemed evil but turned out to not be and has a journal, to find some kind of Quest Object that can, I think, alter time or memories or something, and looks like a jellyfish. they buy gear from apparently literally garfield the cat who runs a fucking costco, jesus christ griffin. that kid from the detective conan anime is a character and so is kravitz, about whom I know three things: he’s death somehow, he’s dating the taco man, and every single fanart of him is hot. there are some sad crime lesbians who turn into a tree and some not sad lesbians named carey and killian but i dont know what they do??? I love lup although I barely know who she is i just know i love her and greg owes her money. everyone’s real sad about an umbrella, they all live on the moon except for when they dont, and maybe they’re all from off-brand NASA and are aliens???? and somehow, tom bodett
how can someone know all that about taz and decide not to listen to it
joke’s on you, I posted this specifically to take advantage of my ignorance two days before I started listening to TAZ and now I have a Bureau of Balance tattoo and 17k notes
Yeah
Just as a general note
You should eliminate any thought that there is an expectation that you do anything by any age
You don’t have to be married with kids by 25
It’s ok to be 16 and never been kissed
There’s nothing wrong with you if you haven’t graduated from college by 22
You’re not a failure because you don’t have your dream job at 30
There are no rules to life. You don’t get special points for achieving certain things by a deadline. Just go at your own speed. It’s not a race.
‘ you don’t get special points for achieving certain things by a deadline
‘
This makes me feel better. I don’t like deadlines on life. It makes your life seem much shorter than it actually is.
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