I’d never heard of this but this is like my entire life.
Because it’s not just fear of rejection or feeling inadequate or disappointed in yourself.
It is an intense, rushing panic, or a fast downward spiral of depression, where I can go from “Today is great, I’m doing a great job!” to “I’m stupid, she hates me, why did I say that, I’m going to just kill myself” in literally seconds. Especially important is that it does not need to even be real rejection–perceived rejection (and related cognitive distortions) feel exactly the same.
This here? Is why I will cry my eyes out when some random person I’m talking to online doesn’t message me for a day, because I feel rejected. Why being told I didn’t clean something right at work makes me go home feeling like I’m going to be fired the next day. Why I procrastinate on projects or confrontation, because the very idea of possibly being rejected is terrifying, because I unconsciously associate it with a feeling comparable to flying off a roller-coaster.
WAT!?!?!? IS THIS WHY I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE SHIT!?!?
Oh my God. Suddenly something makes sense
Sixteen years and this is the first I’ve ever heard of this.
reblogging again, because honestly, everyone should know about this.
Huh.
I wonder if it’s really unique to ADHD and not to be found in other conditions, but in any case this certainly explains some things about my life.
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