Planned Parenthood is fucking amazing, y’all. I haven’t been there yet…but just talking to their HRT line on the phone…
They used my respected name right off the bat. Called me Riley all the way through. Used he/him pronouns. Didn’t slip up once. Asked me and “What’s your legal name? I’m sorry I have to ask that.”
Then asked me “Now is it okay if I send things with Riley Roswell to your home?” not wanting to out me accidentally and then “Is it okay if I send stuff with planned parenthood labels on them or do you want me to be discreet about it?” knowing there are people who could get in trouble with family or partners or others for going there.
OH MY GOD I’M GOING TO CRY AND THEY DIDN’T JUDGE ME AT ALL
THEY WERE TOTALLY ACCEPTING AND ANSWERED ALL MY STUPID FUCKING BASIC QUESTIONS ABOUT HRT ABOUT WHAT THE APPT WAS GONNA BE LIKE
AND SHE WAS SO KIND AND SO UNDERSTANDING
AND SHE RESPECTED ME SO MUCH AND I WAS SO HAPPY
I CAN’T BELIEVE PEOPLE LIKE THAT EXIST IN OUR WORLD.
OH MY GOD.
AND I’M GOING TO BE GOING TO THIS WONDERFUL PLACE ON THE 29TH!!!!!!!!
Well… thats about it! Of course there’s a whole bunch of useful resources which I just couldn’t include in this post because it was getting too long.
Even if you yourself aren’t trans and wouldn’t find this content useful, please reblog because it may be of great help to some of your followers.
And if you ever have any trans-related questions or need some advice or support, feel free to message me at my main blog here or at my personal/transition blog here.
We really have harmed a whole generation of trans and gnc children by failing to communicate how serious a decision binding actually is, how there’s no ACTUALLY safe way to bind, how it permeneantly damages the body, how it can make top surgery more difficult in the future. I don’t think we should be keeping trans kids from binding (we let kids do all sorts of things they’re really not old enough to understand the potential consequences of) but we owe them the ability to make informed decisions at LEAST
So this is definitely an important conversation to have, but can you point me at some reading about “permanent damage”? I might just be lucky, but I had zero lasting effects from binding. I’d like to at least read up on it so I can have this conversation and be more specific than “be careful.”
Of course! I can’t easily source right now but I am more than happy to provide further info when I am not at work and on mobile. Unfortunately, like a lot of trans healthcare, a lot of what we know about binding is anecdotal and word of mouth. BUT permeneant damage can include:
-Musculoskeletal damage. Binders are indiscriminate compression tools; they can’t flatten the chest without applying pressure every other anatomical structure underneath including the spine, ribs, lungs and heart. Many people who bind experience chronic back pain, shoulder pain, sharp stabbing chest pains, permeneantly decreased lung capacity, literal spine deformation, etc etc.
-A continuation of the above but the ribs are actually jointed bones. Their ability to flex is absolutely vital to their ability to withstand trauma and protect your vital organs. Imagine the damage that would be done to your elbow if your bent your arm to full flexion and then tightly bound it closed like that, for six, eight, twelve hours per day, every day, for weeks or months or years. And you don’t NEED a functioning arm to live!
-Tissue atrophy. Forcing chest tissue to lay in an unnatural way can and will change the way that tissue looks, even to risk of atrophy. Some people who bind and only moderately dislike the way their chest looks find that they HATE the way it looks after binding for a period of time. Tissue atrophy can also make top surgery more difficult in the future, and increase the risk of complications like nerve damage.
-Worsened dysphoria. Once someone starts binding and becomes accustomed to seeing themselves with a flat chest, it can be much more difficult to see yourself without one, and dysphoria that much more intolerable. You can imagine the psychological feedback loop of binding more in response.
The typical safety measures passed around about binding are harm REDUCTION measures and should not be advertised as making binding “safe.” Binding is not safe. It is a very serious health decision with long term consequences and should be treated as such. That doesn’t mean it’s the wrong decision, but it should not be considered the DEFAULT decision for chest dysphoria which is frankly how it’s currently treated.
Don’t try that mascara/arm hair shit. I’ve been passing for more than a year with short, blond arm hair. It’s not an important secondary sex characteristic.
Board shorts (without pockets in the front) do wonders to minimize the width of your hips. Always choose board shorts over swim trunks. Choose them over cargo shorts if it’s appropriate.
Speak from your chest, never from your head.
The goal of binding should not be an entirely flat chest; you should bind for your body type.
GC2b makes the best binders out there, and their products are designed specifically for trans men/transmasculine people.
It might seem useless if you’re pre-T, but working out can be a big help for dysphoria.
Eyebrows are really important to passing pre-testosterone. Muss that shit up. Make them look unkempt.
When you ask for a haircut, make sure the edges in the back are squared, not rounded.
If you have peach fuzz, I would advise shaving it. Cis guys shed theirs when they go through puberty. Shaving can also help with facial hair dysphoria.
Don’t ever buy a binder from Amazon. They run in strange sizes (I was an XXL even though I’m a M in GC2b) and take weeks/months to come. It’s also difficult to breathe in them after a few hours.
-Patience is a virtue you need to come to terms with. Even on T, things take time. My voice dropped immediately, but my cycle continued for 6 months. We’re all different.
-In the summer, HYDRATE YOURSELF. A binder is an extra layer, and mine have always been very warm.
-When its not too hot, layers are your friend. You’d be surprised what even simply an undershirt can do to smooth out your look.
-You are going to get misgendered. This is a fact, and it sucks. Learn to politely correct people. Remember you might be the first (openly) trans person they meet, so be a good ambassador.
-When you start T, your smell will change. You will sweat like you’ve never sweat before, and it WILL STINK. Adjust your bathing habits accordingly.
*coughs in direction of my trans friendos*
If you have a really large chest you might do better with Underworks binders. They aren’t pretty, they’re not soft, but they do a good job and were the first on the market for a very long time. I couldn’t stand gc2b so if you’re like me, try Underworks.
Don’t double bind.
DON’T USE DUCK TAPE. I still have scars from a dumb decision I made as a teen and I’m 31 now.
When the time comes for top surgery, shop around. Find someone who will tailor your chest to your needs. Look at their portfolio. Compare surgeons. See if you can find someone who will work with your health insurance if you have it.
Be safe. Be healthy. Take your time. It’s not a race or a competition.
If you are having trouble finding an endo in your location or are sick of traveling far to get to one, consider contacting your local Planned Parenthood.
I was traveling all the way to Seattle on a 2 hour bus just to see my endo and it was a pain and I actually decided to stop taking testosterone just to avoid the stress of traveling to the city alone just sit in office for less than 5 minutes and be sent home. When I first moved here (2 years ago) I was told that they were working on offering HRT but I never heard anything more. Last month I called on a whim and sure enough, they now offer it and just started in June. I now go somewhere that’s only 18 minutes away by bus which is very nice and convenient. I also know some of my friends that live in more rural areas now have somewhere to go when they didn’t before which is nice.
Whether or not your insurance pays for HRT may still be an issue, but Planned Parenthood does take all types of insurance I believe and they also offer a sliding scale program for those that have trouble affording appointments.
Anywho, I hope this information helps someone like it helped me! I haven’t really seen a lot of people taking about yet so I wanted to get the word out there for those who need it!
I know a lot of you out there are struggling to acquire binders, and while you’re waiting to get one you might need an alternative. Ace bandages can be pretty hazardous to your health, so I thought I’d share my binding method with you. It came about out of necessity (I’m not in a position where I can buy myself a commercial binder,) but it’s comfortable and works great. I use it everyday and pass so well, at this point I’m not even looking into commercial binders anymore.
Hope this helps some of you.
ok but like you could reblog things like this for your transboy followers who may not be able to afford to buy a binder so that they can pass as male . … …….
To any trans women and transfeminine followers of mine, did you know there’s a pretty huge Etsy store which does gaff underwear and swimsuits specifically designed for trans people amongst its products? They go in a pretty decent range of sizes, including sizes for young girls, and while I do not personally know anyone who has used them, there’s a fuckton of positive reviews on the Etsy store. They have a ton of colours to choose from, different fabric choices, the works.
And for once they’re not marked “for crossdressers” too, they actually under “transgender”, so that’s (depressingly) unusual.
I’m mostly posting this because I’ve seen a lot of younger people recently in particular saying they never knew what gaffs were… a lot of people find them WAY MORE comfortable and convenient than tucking, so I would recommend looking into them if you’ve never done so before!
And even if you yourself don’t use or need this stuff, do pass this kind of info on to any friends of yours that might, guys! There’s always like a million more PSAs about transmasc stuff as opposed to transfem stuf tbh…
fun tip for cis people: instead of saying “back when she was a he” or “back before [birthname] became [preferred name]”, try not being a pile of shit by saying something like “before she came out” or “before she began her transition”!
Pls friends and thanks.
“before she came out” is so easy and preserves so much dignity, PLEASE
I’ve been wondering the best way to say this. Thank you.
also if their transition is irrelevant to the story, don’t bring it up! just say “when X was a kid/ younger/ in college/ etc” and carry on using their current name and pronouns.
That last point is very important! DO NOT OUT ANYONE! Do not bring up their trans status or transition unnecessarily! And you trying to look more interesting/cool/whatever by having a trans friend does not count as “neccessary”!!
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