Category: Uncategorized

kalcl:

kalcl:

As someone who changed his name just for fun when I thought I was still cis, i promise most people are ok with accepting a new name, even if you lie and say it’s a nickname. I promise. It’s really easy to just casually go “hey I wanna go by Bob now, it’s an old nickname I wanna bring back” like. Just start introducing yourself to new ppl, no one knows better. and if someone accidentally deadnames you just go haha no I go by my nickname now.

It sucks that ppl treat nicknames as more sacred than trans ppls choice names but still.

If ur cis u can totally rb this to help ur fellow trans friends out thanks

moonblossom:

hazeldomain:

In my experience, if you see someone crying and you want to help, “what’s wrong” is a bad question.

I was at Universal yesterday and this woman was sitting on a stone wall and she was crying. Like she was pretty obviously having a bad time.

I have no idea what was wrong with this lady. Maybe her SO dumped her. Maybe someone she loved just died. Maybe one of the haunted houses triggered her. Maybe her friends left her to go do a ride and she feels lonely. Could be anything really.

But from my experience as the Crying Person, “what’s wrong” means that I have to take a personal and sometimes embarrassing situation and figure out how to lay it out for a stranger when I’m already not in a good place.

So I went up and sat on the stone wall a couple feet away and just went “you good?” And she says “yeah.” And I said “you need anything?” And she thinks a second and says “no.” And I said “okay,” waited a second, and left.

I feel like a lot of times media tells people that in order to offer help, they need to look someone in the eye and have a meaningful conversation about the Deeper Issues in their lives and I just… maybe it’s the autism speaking but I like my way more. It gives the person in crisis the choice on whether/how much they want to interact with me.

“What’s wrong?” from a stranger will very often result in “Nothing”, and then the dangerous habit of minimising whatever upset them, “Nothing, I’m just being silly.” or “Nothing, it’s stupid.” etc.

“Can I get you anything?” or “Do you need something?” are questions that have, given the situation, a relatively easy answer. “Do you have a tissue? Thank you so much!” or “Could you help me find the bathroom?” are questions that a distraught person can answer without too much thought, without feeling like they’re overburdening the well-meaning stranger.

I’ve been on both sides of this, many many times. I keep a packet of tissues and mints or candies in my purse at all times, just in case.

This will also give the crying/upset person a moment to gather themselves, and decide if they can honestly share what triggered the situation.

claroquequiza:

Maybe I’m an old man but goddamn, these vampires with blood dripping down their chins–that’s your food!! THAT’S YOUR FOOD!! Close!! Your!! Mouth!! You think some asshole slobbering chicken noodle soup or yogurt or clam chowder all down themselves would be sexy??? What makes you any different, you sticky-stained slackjawed screwball??? Close your mouth!! Use a napkin!! And for godssakes stop looking so smug, like, “Oooo, I’m a creature of the night look at what sustains me” yeah uh huh a fucking lack of basic hygiene is what I’m seeing and it is not impressive!! At all!! My nephews are three years old and they drool less than you do!! You’re how many centuries old?!?! ACT LIKE IT